Comments on: Edward Lane’s Argosy Chapter One: The Blind Lady Of Tudley House http://www.steamypunk.net/edward-lane%e2%80%99s-argosy-chapter-one/ Being the Fanciful Erotica of a SteamPunk World Fri, 20 Jan 2012 07:08:31 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0 By: Roselinda http://www.steamypunk.net/edward-lane%e2%80%99s-argosy-chapter-one/#comment-743 Roselinda Fri, 20 Jan 2012 07:08:31 +0000 http://www.steamypunk.net/?p=36#comment-743 Your story left me....breathless. I adore this genre a great deal and appreciate the adept and cunning use of the creative finesse and the appropriate use of historical linguistics you used. The erotica was spot on as well and quite arousing. I hope you will appreciate these comments in the manner they are intended; I am a writer also and I noticed a few errors. I can't help myself, years of teaching goad me into passing them along to you. Personally, I appreciate it when someone helps with the proofreading and editing, and I hope you do as well. The ones I noticed were: For all I know, this house is scattered with god (gold) and jewels Always quick with a joke or a smoke,(loved this...a line from "The Piano Man! It took me a few minutes to figure out where I had heard it before. I wasn't sure you realized that though) “And that would be?” I (He)asked, curious. Wit (With)the augmented light he could see her face clearly for the first time. My only other comment would be about the exact nature of what the position was of your lovers when he final broached her feminine egress. I had a bit of trouble trying to picture if she was still lying in the chair when he mounted her, or had he lifted her lovely lower limbs and placed them over his shoulders? In any case, I enjoyed the story immensely and will continue on with the next chapter. Thank you for the vastly entertaining evening. Your story left me….breathless. I adore this genre a great deal and appreciate the adept and cunning use of the creative finesse and the appropriate use of historical linguistics you used. The erotica was spot on as well and quite arousing. I hope you will appreciate these comments in the manner they are intended; I am a writer also and I noticed a few errors. I can’t help myself, years of teaching goad me into passing them along to you. Personally, I appreciate it when someone helps with the proofreading and editing, and I hope you do as well. The ones I noticed were:

For all I know, this house is scattered with god (gold) and jewels

Always quick with a joke or a smoke,(loved this…a line from “The Piano Man! It took me a few minutes to figure out where I had heard it before. I wasn’t sure you realized that though)

“And that would be?” I (He)asked, curious.

Wit (With)the augmented light he could see her face clearly for the first time.

My only other comment would be about the exact nature of what the position was of your lovers when he final broached her feminine egress. I had a bit of trouble trying to picture if she was still lying in the chair when he mounted her, or had he lifted her lovely lower limbs and placed them over his shoulders? In any case, I enjoyed the story immensely and will continue on with the next chapter. Thank you for the vastly entertaining evening.

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